How the World Sees You: Discover Your Highest Value Through the Science of Fascination

But over time, people can lose their innate ability to fascinate. They acquire layers of boring.

develop your own compelling way of attracting business, and getting results.

Different is better than better. Different doesn’t try to turn you into something else. Different allows you to highlight the singular traits you already have within you. You aren’t necessarily better than your competition. But you are already different.

Fascination is not the same as interest. It’s a neurological state of intense focus, one that creates an irresistible feeling of engagement.

Forbes describes how Daniel Kahneman, a Nobel Prize-winning psychologist, discovered that “people would rather do business with a person they like and trust rather than someone they don’t, even if the likeable person is offering a lower quality product or service at a higher price.

It turned out that experienced meditators activated the parts of the brain that suppress interruptions and they were able to completely block out the beeps. They protected their own state of fascination.

The addictive nature of Web browsing can leave you with an attention span of nine seconds—the same as a goldfish.

The fact is that the financial advisor must find ways to distinguish himself not just during the initial sales process, but equally importantly on an ongoing basis to keep his clients from going elsewhere.

The reality, however, is that “better” is not better. Better is a mirage. It keeps you chained to the same way of working as your competition. Better is temporary. Better is a flimsy edge that can be toppled in a millisecond by someone with a bigger following, a lower price, a more convenient location, a fancier degree, a shinier award, a newer technology, a more skillful skill. Better is not always better. Sometimes, it’s worse.

The reality is, strengths can be copied. It’s true for your company, and also for you. Products can be replicated. Benefits can be improved upon, secret formulas uncovered, winning systems beaten. People can outdo your strengths. But nobody can outdo who you are. Your personality is the only aspect of your work that nobody can copy. People can copy your product, your pricing, your actions, your recipe or program or formula. But they can never replicate who you are. Who you are is the greatest differentiator you’ve ever had.

Throughout your career, you will compete against people who are more established, more famous, more connected, more specialized. But they can’t be you. They can’t capture your highest distinct value. Only you have you.

When you’re in the zone, you’re more likely to have an epiphany or reach a solution. As you become less self-conscious, you’re more confident, which feels emotionally gratifying.

When you stop trying to be all things to all people, you can stop worrying about being liked and start building relationships that allow you to be loved. If you are not creating a negative response from somebody, you’re probably not very fascinating to anybody.

Who you are is the greatest differentiator you’ve ever had.

You don't need to find the light, you ARE the light; and when you let your personality shine you can light up the world.

Your personality is your natural weapon against distraction, competition, and commoditization. The more value you add, the less you have to compete on price, and the less likely you are to become a commodity.