Ruin (Ruin #1)

All that damn therapy you made me go through — and sometimes, Dad, it takes going through hell to reach your heaven.” I looked at the door. “That bad huh?” “What?” “You like her that much?” “No.” I swallowed. “I love her.

Do it afraid.

Dying without really living. Leaving this world knowing that the girl who makes me want to live the most-will have to do it without me

Fear..." I uncrossed her arms and linked my fingers with hers. "Is what makes us feel alive. Fear causes our blood vessels to constrict, and then the amygdala, a tiny almond shaped part of our brain, sends signals to our nervous system. The signal says run or fight.

For the first time in a year, I wanted to live -- because I wanted to spend every freaking day watching her open her eyes to the world. Hell, I wanted to be the first thing she saw. Sometimes, reality's a bitch.

God…” I choked on the word. “I know we haven’t talked much in the past few years. Hell, I told you I hated you when Tye took his own life.” I cursed again and pinched the bridge of my nose. “I don’t even care about myself anymore, just promise me she’ll be okay. If I don’t make it… if you take me, just let Kiersten be okay. She can’t go down that road — I don’t care if you have to punish me, God. If she’s going to suffer, give me her pain instead. If her heart’s going to break, break mine for hers. Please, God… please.

I can tell you have a good heart…” I sighed, opening the door to the
outside. “…because the minute I met you, I wanted to fight for it.”
She was silent.
“That’s how you can tell when someone has a good heart.”
“When you want to start a war?” She laughed, clearly trying to lighten my
mood.
“Nah.” I sighed.
“When you want to be the one to make it beat.

I can tell you have a good heart..." I sighed, opening the door to the outside." ... because the minute I met you, I wanted to fight for it.

I just want to feel your heart beating.That's all...

I’m going to make it so hard for you to forget this first kiss that you don’t want anyone else kissing you ever again. When the guy you fall in love with kisses you — it better put this kiss to shame — if it doesn’t, then he isn’t the right guy. Because I’m going to do a damn good job, and I want the guy that earns you, that takes that heart of yours and holds it in the palm of his hands… I want that guy to be able to make you feel things I’ll just be tapping into. Do you understand, Kiersten?

In life we always have some measure of control whether it be over our emotions or choices, but when it comes to cancer? The only thing you can control is how you respond to it

I prayed over and over again that God would spare me, not because I cared that much about my own life -- but because I cared about hers.

Just because you need help to cope doesn’t make you any less strong. The truly weak people in this life are the ones who can’t admit they need help. They’re the ones who can’t admit that they can no longer go at it alone. Those are the people who are weak. By asking for help, by taking help, you’ve just admitted your weakness and in that, you find your strength. The weak of the world are those who think they’ve got it all figured out and flaunt it to others.

Leave it to Wes to use sex as a reason not to die.

Life isn’t about deserving.” I closed my eyes and sighed. “Aren’t you the one always spouting all that wisdom?” He grinned. “If we wait until we’re deserving, we’re going to be waiting for a really long time.” I shrugged. “I’d rather appreciate the fact that I’ll never deserve anything — doesn’t make me a bad person, just makes me all the more thankful.

Life isn’t fair, but living? Living is heaven. Living is a gift. Every gift is different — every path is different — for some reason this is ours, and the sooner we accept it, the sooner we can stop crying and start living.

Living is hard--dying is easy. You close your eyes and never open them again. What's so difficult about that? Nothing really--except it hurts like hell to those you leave behind.

Maybe it's not in the perfection of life that things make sense, but in the chaos.

No matter how afraid you are - you can still make the choice to fight. You can still make the choice to walk through the fire- he said to do it afraid.

Note to self, when a girl’s smile makes you forget your own name – you’re in some deep shit.

…one, two, three, four, six, Good Lord, eight? Eight packs? Furthermore, had I actually been feeling said person’s eight pack? And, dear God, I was counting. I had touched each muscle. And great, my hand was still firmly placed against the guy’s stomach.

I jerked my hand back and closed my eyes.

“Were you just counting my abs?” His voice sounded amused. It also sounded like a movie star voice, the type that makes you want to jump into the TV screen.

So there’s never a reason to be afraid of running out of time — because we keep our own.

the nurse smiled and patted my arm. “Don’t give up yet. Sometimes when we think God has written The End, what he really means is The Beginning.

Time was the most precious thing in the world to me, and I’d just given her all of it. Because I was falling for her. Because I cared for her. Because I wanted to give her something to remember me by, even if it would eventually fade like its namesake. Time… what an absolute horror-inducing word

We're all a bit crazy,it's what makes us human.

What do you love more?” she teased. “My hair or my heart?” “Why give me only two choices? Don’t leave out your legs, your laugh, the way you bite your lip when you’re thinking, the feel of your breath on my face, the sound of your voice in the morning, the way you taste, the three freckles on your nose, the fan of your eyelashes, the caring spirit, the determined soul — so why stop at your hair and your heart? How do you expect me to choose? When what I love the most about you — is you.

What you two have — it’s a once in a lifetime — you fight for him, sweetheart. Fight for him with every last breath. No regrets, okay?

Wherever I am, whatever I'm doing, alive or dead, young or old, my heart will always be with yours. Every beat you feel against your fingertips..." His fingers tapped against my chest, once, twice. "... is me calling out to you. It's you returning the call. It's us talking, communicating, bonding, sharing, Living -- Kiersten, it's us living.

You may not see every single piece of the puzzle that creates your life -- you may not see every move the grand chess player makes -- but know, He is in complete control of the game board. Sometimes certain pieces are moved or knocked over to make room for new ones. Other times, things happen because of the world we live in. But everything in the end, will always turn out for good. It's a nice promise, isn't it? To know there's a reason for it all?

You rescued me and I found my ruin." I bit down on my lip. "I'm ruined for you - and I won't ever be the same. It's the greatest gift anyone has ever given me.